RELATIONSHIP MASTERY - The 4 Social Styles

If you are on a journey of improving relationships with yourself and others, discovering ourselves, we need to understand what our Social Style is. A Social Style is based on our personality traits and how we engage with other people. The four broad Social Style categories are Drivers, Expressives, Analyticals, and Amiables.

THE DRIVER – THE CONTROL SPECIALIST

A Driver is a personality that is obsessed with performance and productivity. Drivers have a passion for acquiring knowledge and then applying that knowledge in order to achieve goals. They are constantly searching for the “whys” of life. They work at a decisive pace and are always looking to increase their productivity. Drivers measure personal worth by how much they do. While they are results-driven, they will step back to ensure that they are pursuing the right objectives. Drivers like being in charge. Naturally, loss of control and being idle will drive a Driver crazy. Drivers are succinct and to the point. They detest waffle and get irritated by ambivalence, indecision, and inefficiency. A Driver won't shy away from a tough interaction, and under pressure, will assert themselves, focusing on the task at hand and getting the desired results. A growth-minded Driver will not fear rejection and criticism. Drivers will leverage their masterminds for advice so that they can make good decisions quickly. They are confident in the decisions they make and will, therefore, be slow to reverse or change their decisions.

When engaging these ambitious go-getters, we need to be professional and punctual. Drivers are typically Leaders like Chairmen, CEOs, and Presidents, so they are usually very busy and while it’s okay for them to keep you waiting, don’t dare let them wait. By planning ahead, you will be able to deliver quicker results, and this will help you in scoring brownie points with them that will in turn help to build rapport and trust. Cut out the chit-chat when you meet them and get to the point, quickly. They like to be in control, so play to that trait by giving Driver options. The more power you give away the more power you actually have, so give power away freely and let them think that they are in control. In Relationships, they may appear cold, uncommunicative and independent and don’t really see the need to share feelings and emotions with others.

THE ANALYTICAL – THE TECHNICAL SPECIALIST

These incredibly smart people are formal and conservative by nature. They can be counted on and are dependable and reliable. They have a strong value set that features a strong sense of duty and obligation, coupled with a strong work ethic and ethos. Analytical-orientated people favor environments that have a strong flavor for careful preparation that recognizes their pedantic, diligent and logical work. They don’t like change, tend to take on too much and are sometimes worry-pots. They will focus on the job that needs to be done, and in stressful situations, will withdraw into a space autonomous of their underlying stress so that they can drive a solution. Because of their unique propensity in synthesizing data, numbers, and facts, Analyticals add sterling value in the Legal and Accounting professions.

When working with an Analytical, the cardinal rule is to slowly present the facts. If you are using illustrations, be prepared to field lots of questions substantiating it. Give guarantees and assurances when trying to convince an Analytical to your point-of-view.